[Publib] re: pet names

[Backwage at aol.com]

When I was in the navy, I discovered that everybody would call me Mack for  
some reason.  It turned out that they couldn't figure out my last name, and  of 
course, nobody goes by their first name in the service anyway; even among  
friends because there are so many with the same name.  So, Mack it was, and  
remains anywhere where there is more than one Michael present.  I suppose I  
could have resented this, but the alternative names were somewhat less  
pleasant--even where more descriptive.  
 
Equally amusing is that people commonly say, "Oh, you're Irish."  I've  had 
years of fun telling them that I'm mostly Mexican.  This brings on some  
interesting responses, among them the familiar "You don't act Mexican."  I  tell 
them it took me years of lessons to get to this point.  I suppose I  could say, 
"And you don't look like an idiot," but then, I've mellowed with the  years.  
My own grandmother, whose name was Zamora, was born in Mexico but  spoke 
accentless English; she developed a wicked mock-Mexican dialect routine  that she 
would dust off for intrusive strangers.  Her son, my uncle, would  have friends 
over from college sometimes; they thought that, speaking perfect  English, he 
must be of Mediterranean extraction, an impression which he did  nothing to 
dispel.  Once, some of the boys noticed a lady in the kitchen  speaking Spanish 
on the phone.  They asked my uncle who the lady was, and  he said, "She's the 
maid."  
 
I remember my mother, who had less of a sense of humor than it took to be  
Mexican-American in the old days, getting quite angry at people who gave her  
"amusing" nicknames at work.  One of the tendencies of the era was to call  any 
Mexican by the name of an Hispanic movie actor or singer.  One day,  while she 
was working at an aircraft plant, some guy called Mom "Lupe Velez" for  about 
the tenth time, whereupon she struck him in the mouth with a hand  tool.  Mom 
didn't think it a compliment, though Velez was certainly a  number in her 
day.  You can look it up.
 
Michael (Ochotorena-Zamora) McGrorty
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