[Publib] Human contact

Thu Dec 1 10:27:07 EST 2005

Dear Publibbers,

Yesterday I questioned whether pushing work off on to patrons --
via phone tree / phone menuing systems and self checkouts --
is good customer service.  It strikes me that our use of these
technologies is a case of "we'll improve OUR productivity and
OUR convenience at the expense of YOUR productivity and YOUR
convenience."

No sooner had I carped and whined in this manner than the
item I reproduce below came over my electronic transom.
I don't know how well it works, as I haven't yet tried it out, but
the fact that someone took the time and trouble to assemble
a "cheat sheet" to subvert IVR (interactive voice response)
phone systems is, to me, telling.  How esteemed, indeed, is
human contact!

If I were the director of a library system (am not nor ever will
be), I'd resist the temptation to erect an IVR wall, and ballyhoo
the fact that my institution is one that, when you call on the phone,
you get a human being.  Not only would it be respectful of patrons,
it would be terrific PR.

IMHO. (And it is humble indeed, as I am but one of the grunts
and hod-carriers of the profession.)

Is there anyone who actually loves IVR systems and their
kin, or do we all find them hellishly frustrating, time
consuming, and Kafka-esque?

I thought so.

-- JS

PS.  I find the note appended to AT&T Wireless mordantly amusing:
"No easy escape."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The IVR Cheat Sheet
from Paul English of Kayak.com.

Here are the secret numbers and tips to bypass IVR phone menus
TO GET TO A HUMAN BEING.

Finance -- phone steps to find a human:

American Express 800-528-4800 0
ATT Universal 800-950-5114 ###
Bank of America 800-900-9000 1 loan; 2 account; 3 investing; 4 info; or 
00 to human
Bank One 877-226-5663 0,0
Capital One Visa 800-867-0904 ignore prompts and invalid entry 
warnings; press #0 four times
Charles Schwab 800-435-9050 3 then 0
Chase 800-CHASE24 5 pause 1 4
CitiBank 800-374-9700 1 online support; 2 billpay; 3 non-online; 4 
credit card; or 0 to human
Discover 800-347-2683 ****
E-Trade 800-387-2331 ####
Fidelity 800-544-6666 ignore prompt for social security number, just 
enter ###
MasterCard 800-MC-ASSIST 000 on each menu
MBNA 800-421-2110 00# when menu starts
Paypal 650 864-8000 cf http://paypalsucks.com/PayPalPhoneNumbers.shtml
Sovereign Bank 800-SOV-BANK 1 english; 1 personal; 3 then social#; 
passcode, #; then 0 (1-3x)
Sun Trust Banks 404-588-7815 Yes
US Bank 800-US BANKS 0000
Visa 800-847-2911 000 (ignore prompts saying that it's an invalid entry)
Wachovia 800-922-4684 accounts personal banking
Washington Mutual 800-756-8000 At any time after the announcement(s) 
press 0,0.
Wells Fargo 800-869-3557 0,0,0
Western Union 800-325-6000 * then ##

Government -- phone steps to find a human:

INS 800-375-5283 After selecting English, (with a 2 second delay 
between) 2 6 2 4
Social Security 800-772-1213 00 will confuse computer and send you to 
an agent
Veterans Affairs 800-827-1000 1,0

Insurance -- phone steps to find a human:

Aetna 800-537-9384 "2, then say ""operator"" (check this)"
Aetna 800-680-3566 * then 0 anytime
AFLAC 800-99-AFLAC ***
Ameritas 800-745-1112 0,0,0
CIGNA 800-516-2898 REGARDING A BILL
Cigna 800-849-9000 ##
GEICO 800-841-3000 Wait for prompt then 6, 1, 5
Humana 800-4-HUMANA After entering insurance number and details, 0.
Medicare 800-633-4227 "After the opening prompt say ""agent""."
Principal Life 800-247-4695 1 for english, 2, then 0 several times 
until it redirects you to an operator.

Pharmacy -- phone steps to find a human:

CVS local listing dial local store, after promt. press 6 will connect 
to store manager
Eckerd 800-eckerds 0 for pharmacy, 8* for manager
Rite Aid Local Store Press 3 to speak to the pharmacy
Walgreens local store 0 for a pharmacy employee

Products -- phone steps to find a human:

Bose 800-444-2673 Direct to human!
Sonos 800-680-2345 1 sales; 2 support
Sony 800-222-7669 "When prompted by the automated voice system to 
answer ANY questions, just say ""Agent"""

Retail -- phone steps to find a human:

Advance Auto 800-314-4243 0 when the automated message begins
Amazon.com 800-201-7575 Direct to human!
Best Buy 800-365-0292 00*
Best Buy local store wait for extension prompt (sometimes must 4), then 
ext. 2021
Circuit City local store 0 for customer service or 218 for store manager
eBay 800-322-9266 0,0
Home Depot 800 677-0232 "When asked for account number, keep hitting 
""#"". After 5 or 6 times, a human appears!"
Home Shopping Net 800-284-3100 0
Ikea 800 434-IKEA "0000000 (hit ""0"" many times fast, if you do it 
once, or too slow, it will merely repeat the menu)"
K-Mart local store 0
Kohl's 800 5645740 After providing account info, press 0 three times
Lowes local store 0 for customer service or #450 for commercial sales
Old Navy 800-OLD-NAVY 0
Overstock.com 800-843-2446 At the main menu, 0 three to four times to 
bypass the menu
QVC 800-367-9444 0
Safeway local store As soon as voice prompt starts type 1200 to get 
human
Sears 800-4-MY-HOME Silence don't push numbers just sit there and you 
will be placed at front of queue.
Target local store 0 during greeting.
"Toys ""R"" Us" local store 0
Wal-Mart 800-925-6278 1 for directory

Shipping -- phone steps to find a human:

DHL 800-225-5345 press 1, press 5, press 0, enter your phone number.
FedEx 888-GO-FEDEX "At message say ""Representative"""
UPS 800-pick-ups 0,0
USPS 800-275-8777 7-3-2-0-0 or send them some junk mail

Technology -- phone steps to find a human:

AOL 800-827-6364 0
Apple 800-275-2273 "000; if virtual rep answers, say ""operator"""
Compaq 800-652-6672 No easy escape
Dell 888-560-8324 2 order; 3 support; 4 purchase help; or 00 to human
Dell Service 800-624-9897 option 1, xt 7266966, option 1, option 4, 
option 4
Earthlink 888-earthlink 1 find a dialin number; 2 billing; 3 sales; 4 
support
Epson 800-922-8911 yes
Gateway 800-846-2301 00#
HP 800-474-6836 "Say ""agent""."
HP 888-560-8324 00
IBM 800-IBM-4YOU You go into a hold queue immediately
Microsoft 800-936-5700 Always 0. This is true for just about any MS 
number.
QuickBooks 888-729-1996 1 purchase; 2 billing; 3 registration; 4 tech 
support or 0 to human
Symantec 800-441-7234 00

Telco -- phone steps to find a human:

AT&T 800-222-0300 #### then 1 if for current phone, else 2 to enter 
other, else 3
AT&T Wireless 800-888-7600 No easy escape
BellSouth 877-678-2355 *0
Cellular One 888-910-9191 "4, say ""agent"", then #"
Cingular 800-331-0500 For faster service, the option that you are 
looking to close your account, You get the same ppl but an immediate 
answer
Nextel 800-639-6111 0 five times
SBC 800-585-7928 Again, an (intelligent, this time) IVR wants YOUR 
phone number first.
Sprint PCS 888-788-5001 "If live person does not answer, 00, then say 
""agent"""
T-Mobile 800-TMOBILE "Say ""representative"" at any time."
Verizon DSL 800 567 6789 "Say ""I don't know it"" then ""technician"""
Verizon Wireless 800-922-0204 #00 or enter phone # then 0 then 4

Travel -- phone steps to find a human:

American Airlines 800-433-7300 "00, then say ""agent"""
Amtrak 800-872-7245 "0 or say ""agent"""
Delta 800-221-1212 "say ""agent"" four times - every time it asks for a 
response from you"
jetBlue 800 JET-BLUE 1 flight status; 2 reservations; 3 vacation 
packages
Kayak.com 203 899-3120 0
Northwest 800-225-2525 Star, 0,0 after initial greeting
Southwest 800-435-9792 Calls answered by operator; during busy times 
you might have to hold
United 800-864-8331 Do nothing, wait for human.
US Airways 800-428-4322 4, wait, 1
Walt Disney World 407-824-4521 Direct line to Magic Kingdom Guest 
Relations

Tv/satellite -- phone steps to find a human:

Comcast 800-266-2278 Customer service, but an IVR wants your number 
first.
Direct TV 800-347-3288 0 repeatedly
Dish Network 800-333-3474 0 during menu
Sirius 888 539-7474 0
TiVo 877-367-8486 "Say ""Live Agent"""
Xm Radio 800-998-7900 Direct to human! 